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October 29, 2008

GOD, grant me the
to accept the things
I cannot change

Courage to change the
things I can
and the
to know the difference.

Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardship as the
pathway to peace.

Taking, as He did, this
sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it.

Trusting that He will make
all things right if I
surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy
in this life, and supremely
happy with Him forever in
the next.


~By Reinhold Neibuhr

Dwyane has just been suspended from school for 3 days 😦 The trials of a teenage boy are never easy and I think the above quote fits perfectly with how I’m feeling at the moment.

Unfortunately Dwayne is struggling with every aspect of his life ATM 😦
I have gotten him an appointment to see a “talk, speech pathologist” as we think he is having trouble processing information. He’s failing yr 11…he’s already told us that…he had a whole week off last week, and all this week he has been complaining of stomach pains. Personally I think its because he so badly doesn’t want to be at school anymore that its making him physically sick.

I cry for him because if he doesn’t finish year 11 he is going to struggle with life badly…but we have come to the realisation that school is making him sick…he just struggles with it more than any one should and he is so miserable 99% of the time. I think he needs to leave, get himself a job and perhaps go back to school as an adult re-entry a bit later on, when he can understand what his learning difficulties are. Does that make sense?

I feel like I have really let him down as a Mum.
That makes me feel really bad 😦

4 Comments leave one →
  1. November 3, 2008 7:56 pm

    I have said that prayer as often as I need it every day for the past 7 years.
    You have not let him down, talk to him about what he would like to do – maybe a TAFE stream would be far less stressful for him. I’ve been there and survived.

  2. October 29, 2008 7:34 pm

    Dear Tammy,
    My heart goes out to you and your son. I know that my brother really struggled at school and was deeply unhappy during year 11. Mum was very angry when she discovered the teachers had made the decision for him to finish up at the end of year 11 and not go onto year 12 – all without discussing it with her. She ended up taking him out of high school and sending him to Muirden’s Secondary College and all of a sudden he blossomed with a different teaching environment. He repeated year 10 and then said he wanted to be a mechanic – Mum & Dad’s condition was that he got into a prevocational course at TAFE. He ended up passing his entire course with distinctions and high distinctions. Which he did and now he is a foreman in charge of a large auto dealership workshop.

    Not all of us are cut out for university. And some of us flourish doing something we really want to do. Keeping you and your son in my thoughts as you face this difficult time.

    Lisa (Camelot forum)

  3. October 29, 2008 5:18 pm

    Oh gosh Tammy – I read this on the Boxx aswell, so sorry. Sounds like he’s having a tough time. My son is only little atm, but I saw what my Mum went through with my brothers – at that age I dont think their behaviour is much to do with their Mum’s at all!

    Like Kerryn said, some kids just arnt ‘wired’ for formal schooling. My hubby didnt do great at school, he was just bored, started uni twice, dropped out twice, and now has a job in an office where everyone else is an engineer.

    You never know what tomorrow will bring, but perhaps him finding a job he’s happy with now will build his confidence – like you said, he can always go back later.

    (Again, so easy for me to say with an 18 month old!)

    Good luck 🙂


  4. October 29, 2008 3:56 pm

    Oh no…don’t beat yourself up over this. Some kids are just not wired for formal schooling at this age and may need a different path. You are a good mum to at least understand his struggles and to try and help him!
    My DS has had issues at school too and it is heartbreaking and makes you feel like a bad parent, I know. Try not to wear the guilt and put him to work at home for three days *wink*.
    By the way, I saw your package at the Boxx…is it a ‘pickly’ package with that signature??? Hmmmmm curious!!!

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